Books and Websites
Abuse | Anger | Anxiety | Assertiveness | Attachment Issues | Boundaries | Chronic Pain | Communication Skills | Compassion | Death & Loss |Depression| Health Issues | Harassment| Men’s Issues | Mental Health Issues | Mindfulness/Meditation | Parenting | Pet Loss | Phobias | Positive Psychology | Post-traumatic Stress | Reproductive Loss | Self-Harm | Shame | Social Anxiety | Stress Management | Suicide
Here are some self-help books and websites that you might find useful: click on one of the topics listed above to go directly to that section.
ABUSE
Women Recovering From Childhood Sexual Abuse
The Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis
Trauma and Recovery by Judith Herman
Men Recovering From Childhood Sexual Abuse
Victims No Longer by Michael Lew
Wounded Boys, Heroic Men by Daniel Sonkin
Internet Resources
Male Survivor – Overcoming sexual victimization of boys and men.
For Partners Of Adult Survivors Of Childhood Sexual Abuse
Allies in Healing by Laura Davis
Growing Beyond Survival by Elizabeth G Vermilyea
For Battered Women
The Battered Woman by Lenore Walker
Internet Resources
Why domestic violence victims don’t leave
Leslie Morgan Steiner was in “crazy love” — that is, madly in love with a man who routinely abused her and threatened her life. Steiner tells the dark story of her relationship, correcting misconceptions many people hold about victims of domestic violence, and explaining how we can all help break the silence.
Date Or Acquaintance Rape
I Never Called It Rape by Robin Warshaw
Women Who Have Endured Verbal Abuse
The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans
Bullying
Internet Resources
Bully Online Managed by Tim Field. A comprehensive website devoted to all forms of bullying, how to recognize bullying, resources, case histories, and advice.
“Cyberbullying: The New Online Crime”
ANGER
Written For Women But Just As Helpful For Men In Understanding What Causes Anger
The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner
Anger Management Techniques
The Anger Workbook by Lorraine Bilodeau
Letting Go of Anger by Ron Potter-Efron and Pat Potter-Efron
ANXIETY
Anxiety Management Guides
The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund J. Bourne
Mastery of Your Anxiety and Panic II by David Barlow and Michael J. Craske
Managing Panic Attacks
Don’t Panic by Reid Wilson
The Fear Book: Facing Fear Once and For All by Cheri Huber
Internet Resources
Anxiety BC – The purpose of this website is to inform you of the features of the various ways excess anxiety can express itself and also to provide you with effective strategies to begin to address your anxiety.
Anxiety Disorders Association of America – This site offers complete information on anxiety, as well as a special section on teen anxiety.
www.adaa.org
Bounce Back: Reclaim Your Health is a new program designed to help people experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety that may arise from stress or other life circumstances. The project is led by CMHA BC Division and funded by the BC Ministry of Health Services. You will need a referral from your family doctor.
TAPIR: The Anxiety Panic Internet Resource
ASSERTIVENESS
Assertiveness Skill Training In General
Your Perfect Right by Robert Alberti and Michael Emmons
When I Say No I Feel Guilty by Manuel Smith
Internet Resources
Your body language shapes who you are
Amy Cuddy talks about how body language affects how others see us, but it may also change how we see ourselves. Amy Cuddy shows how “power posing” — standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don’t feel confident — can affect testosterone and cortisol levels in the brain, and might even have an impact on our chances for success.
Assertiveness Skill Training For Women
The Assertive Woman by Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin
ATTACHMENT ISSUES
Becoming Attached by Robert Karen
BOUNDARIES
Brene Brown discusses empathy, compassion, and boundaries.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSbOIas6jFc
CHRONIC PAIN
Inside Chronic Pain by Lous Heshusius
The Mindfulness Solution to Chronic Pain by Jackie Gardner-Nix
Internet Resources
Understanding Pain – a 5 minute Australian NIH client education film about chronic pain.
Self-Management Programs By The University of Victoria – Persons with chronic health conditions and family members can participate in self-management programs offered in communities throughout BC at no cost. These are evidence-based programs which provide information, teach practical skills and give people the confidence to manage their health condition(s).
Opioid Addiction – This site is for those suffering from an opioid addiction. The site contains self-assessment tools, descriptions of how detoxification works, links to support groups, and detailed instructions on how to get help.
COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Boundaries: When to say yes and when to say no by Henry Cloud and John Townsend
Getting The Love You Want by Harville Hendrix
How Can I Get Through To You by Terrance Real
Life Skills for Adult Children by Janet Wotitz
You Just Don’t Understand Me by Deborah Tannen
Internet Resources
New Conversations – cooperative communication skills extended learning community.
Relationship Issues
Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
Don’t Let Your Kids Kill You: A Guide for Parents of Drug and Alcohol Addicted Children by Charles Rubin
Getting Past The Affair by Douglas Snyder, Donald Baucom, & Kristina Coop Gordon
COMPASSION
Internet Resources
Charter for Compassion – TED Prize winner Karen Armstrong’s wish is realized as the Charter for Compassion officially launches. This is a document created by thousands of people around the world. It is capable of enabling a new dialog between the major religions and between religious and nonreligious people.
Self Compassion – This website provides information about self-compassion and is intended for researchers, students, and the general public. It also has a questionnaire where you can assess how much self-compassion you have.
The difference between self-esteem and self compassion – In this TED talk Dr. Kristin Neff talks about the space between self-esteem and self-compassion, and the difference between the two. A very inspiring and helpful talk.
COMPULSIVE HOARDING
Internet Resources
Troubles with Junk: A Guide to Compulsive Hoarding
DEATH, LOSS AND GRIEVING
Coping With Loss Of Any Kind
How to Survive the Loss of a Love by Melba Colgrove and Associates
For Grief by John O’Donohue
When you lose someone you love,
Your life becomes strange,
The ground beneath you becomes fragile,
Your thoughts make your eyes unsure;
And some dead echo drags your voice down
Where words have no confidence
Your heart has grown heavy with loss;
And though this loss has wounded others too,
No one knows what has been taken from you
When the silence of absence deepens.
Flickers of guilt kindle regret
For all that was left unsaid or undone.
There are days when you wake up happy;
Again inside the fullness of life,
Until the moment breaks
And you are thrown back
Onto the black tide of loss.
Days when you have your heart back,
You are able to function well
Until in the middle of work or encounter,
Suddenly with no warning,
You are ambushed by grief.
It becomes hard to trust yourself.
All you can depend on now is that
Sorrow will remain faithful to itself.
More than you, it knows its way
And will find the right time
To pull and pull the rope of grief
Until that coiled hill of tears
Has reduced to its last drop.
Gradually, you will learn acquaintance
With the invisible form of your departed;
And when the work of grief is done,
The wound of loss will heal
And you will have learned
To wean your eyes
From that gap in the air
And be able to enter the hearth
In your soul where your loved one
Has awaited your return
All the time.
Internet Resources
Widownet – established in 1995, it is the first online information and self-help resource for, and by, widows and widowers.
Spiritual Approach To Loss
When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner
Death Of A Loved One
How to Go on Living When Someone You Love Dies by Theresa Rando
Helping A Child Learn To Cope With Grief
Learning to say Good-By by Eda LeShan
DEPRESSION
Autobiographies By People Who Have Suffered From Severe Depression
Darkness Visible by William Styron
Undercurrents by Martha Manning
Cognitive-Behavioural Strategies For Managing Depression
Mind Over Mood by Dennis Greenberger and Christine A. Padesky
The Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns
Decreasing Depression By Brief And Practical Suggestions
When Living Hurts by Michael D. Yapko
Using Mindfulness to Ease Depression
The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion by Christopher Germer
The Mindful Way Through Depression by Mark Williams, John Teasdale, Zindel Segal, & Jon Kabat-Zinn
Internet Resources
Antidepressant Skills Workbook
Bounce Back: Reclaim Your Health is a new program designed to help people experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety that may arise from stress or other life circumstances. The project is led by CMHA BC Division and funded by the BC Ministry of Health Services. You will need a referral from your family doctor.
Centre for Mental Health Research Blue Pages at the Australian National University
Dealing with Depression Antidepressant skills for teens
Managing Depression – An informative blog article by Michael D. Yapko, Ph.D.
Mood Disorder Association is a non-profit society dedicated to providing education and support for those with mood disorders and other mental illness.
Mood Gym Training Program – Delivering cognitive behaviour therapy for preventing depression.
U.S. National Mental Health Association online depression screening.
Wing of Madness – Clinical depression information and support.
12 Steps to creating motivation when depressed
HARASSMENT
You Don’t Have to Take It: A Woman’s Guide to Confronting Emotional Abuse at Work by Ginny NiCarthy, Naomi Gottlieb, and Sandra Coffman
Internet Resources
HEALTH ISSUES
Managing Pain Before It Manages You by Margaret A. Caudill
Mainstay: A Companion Book For The Well Spouse of The Chronically Ill by Maggie Strong
The Mindfulness Solution to Pain by Dr. Jackie Gardner-Nix
The Wisdom Of Menopause by Christine Northrup, MD
Internet Resources
Self-Management Programs By The University of Victoria – Persons with chronic health conditions and family members can participate in self-management programs offered in communities throughout BC at no cost. These are evidence-based programs which provide information, teach practical skills and give people the confidence to manage their health condition(s).
MEN’S ISSUES
Examining The Destructive Myths Of Boyhood
Real Boys by William Pollack
Stages And Transitions In A Man’s Life Cycle
Season’s of a Man’s Life by Danial J. Levinson
MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES
Internet Resources
Antidepressant Withdrawal – if you are considering stopping your antidepressants, you may want to check out this blog on the best way to do it.
Canadian Mental Health Association (BC) exists to promote the mental health of British Columbians and support the resilience and recovery of people experiencing mental illness.
Education Programs For The Public – Changeways sponsors a series of presentations for the public on psychological topics of broad interest. Psychology Salon aims to provide informative and entertaining programs that offer practical strategies for common life situations.
Mental Help Net – mental health, wellness, education and advocacy.
Mood Disorders Association of British Columbia has a vision of seeing people with a mood disorder living a healthy and active life.
National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) This site provides information from the US Federal agency that conducts and supports research on mental illnesses
Obsessive Compulsive Foundation (OCF) The OCF is an international not-for-profit organization composed of people with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and related disorders, their families, friends, professionals and other concerned individuals
Psychcentral Managed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. The site claims to be the Internet’s largest and oldest mental health social network created and run by mental health professionals to guarantee reliable, trusted information and support communities to consumers, for over 12 years.
The Skillful Means “wiki” – sponsored by the Wellspring Institute – is a great and growing collection of freely offered methods for psychological or spiritual growth.
MINDFULNESS/MEDITATION
Full Catastrophe Living by John Kabot Zen
Peace Is Every Step by Thich Nhat Hanh
10 Quotes for a Mindful Day by Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D. July 16, 2009 (below)
Sometimes quotes can be just the bite size piece of wisdom we need to pop us into a mindful state of mind. Here are 10 quotes from leading people in the field of mindfulness that might just do that.
“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.” – Dalai Lama
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” – Dalai Lama
“There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
“If it isn’t good, let it die. If it doesn’t die, make it good.” – Ajahn Chah
“If we learn to open our hearts, anyone, including the people who drive us crazy, can be our teacher.” – Pema Chodron
“As soon as we wish to be happier, we are no longer happy.” – Walter Landor
“Hatred never ceases by hatred; it only ceases by love.This is a timeless truth” – Joseph Goldstein
“There is no enlightenment outside of daily life.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
“Realize that this very body, with its aches and it pleasures… is exactly what we need to be fully human, fully awake, fully alive.” – Pema Chodron
“When we scratch the wound and give into our addictions we do not allow the wound to heal.” – Pema Chodron
Internet Resources
A Review of Mindfulness (8 Page PDF) by Jeffrey M. Greeson, Ph.D., M.S.
Shambhala Sun – You don’t have to be a Buddhist to meditate. It is just that they have 2,500 years of experience to share with us. Click on the link for a number of articles on how to start meditating
Start your Day Right by Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.
Download Meditations You can download free mindfulness meditations from this site
Rollin McCraty Science of the Heart – Recent discoveries have shown that the heart generates a mysterious and powerful electromagnetic field. In this video, Rollin McCraty, Ph.D, Executive VP and Director of Research for the Institute of HeartMath, explores the scientific basis for understanding the amazing ways that we are connected.
4 Steps to Shaping a Wiser Brain – A great site for mindfulness and controlling our negative thinking
Mindfulness is Popular but Does it Actually Do Anything? – A CBC Radio podcast from the program Quirks and Quarks; examining whether mindfulness works
PARENTING
Kids’, Parents and Power Struggles by Mary Sheedy Kurcink
PET LOSS & BEREAVEMENT
Internet Resources
Cat and Dog Help: Pet Bereavement Resources
PHOBIAS
Internet Resources
The Psychology of Phobias Whether young or old, male or female, short or tall- everyone, at some point, experiences
POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY
Internet Resources
Authentic Happiness – Develop insights into yourself and the world around you through these scientifically tested questionnaires, surveys, and scales.
The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self Compassion
In this TED talk Dr. Kristin Neff talks about the space between self-esteem and self-compassion, and the difference between the two. A very inspiring and helpful talk.
Jane McGonigal: The game that can give you 10 extra years of life
When game designer Jane McGonigal found herself bedridden and suicidal following a severe concussion, she had a fascinating idea for how to get better. She dove into the scientific research and created the healing game, SuperBetter. Click here for her SuperBetter game website.
POSTTRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER
Internet Resources
John Briere’s Psychological Trauma Clinic
The Trauma Center (Justice Resource Institute Massachusetts)
Veterans Affirs App for PTSD – free download
REPRODUCTIVE LOSS
Reflections for Mothers and Fathers After Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Infant Death
An Empty Cradle, a Full Heart by Christine O’Keeffe Lafser
Finding Hope and Healing after Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant Death
Hope is like the Sun by Lisa Church
Internet Resources
Fertility Plus by Nancy Newman
MISS Foundation – support groups for family members and resources for caregivers.
“Empty Cradle, Broken Heart” by Davis
SELF-HARM
Internet Resources
Dialectical Behaviour Therapy Centre of Vancouver, Inc. – a bi-monthly blog that address a variety of topics related to recurrent self-harm and suicidality and other problems characteristic of Borderline Personality Disorder.
ISSUES OF SHAME
Masters of Disguise by Jane Middleton-Moz
Internet Resources
Brene Brown studies vulnerability and shame. Check out her two talks on TED: The Power of Vulnerability and Listening to Shame.
SOCIAL ANXIETY
The Art of Civilized Conversation by Margaret Shepherd
The Introvert Advantage by Marti Olsen Laney
Painfully Shy: How to Overcome Social Anxiety and Reclaim Your Life by Marbara G. Markway, Ph.D.
The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook by MM Anthony
STRESS MANAGEMENT
Ways To Reduce Stress
The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook by Martha Davis and Associates
Meditation And Mindfulness
Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn
On The Mind-Body Connection
The Wellness Book by Herbert Benson
When the Body Says No by Gabor Maté
SUICIDE
Internet Resources
Coping with Suicidal Thoughts is intended for individuals who are currently experiencing suicidal ideation and/or have had a plan or made an attempt to hurt themselves. The document is designed to offer resources, information, support, and practical steps to help cope with suicidality.
Hope and Healing: A Practical Guide for Survivors of Suicide is a guide that focuses on the practical matters that survivors need to deal with after a suicide. This resource was developed by the Suicide Response Initiative of the Calgary Health Region, with support from the Alberta Mental Health Board, and adapted by CARMHA with permission for use in BC.