Books and Websites

Abuse | AngerAnxiety | Assertiveness | Attachment Issues | Boundaries | Chronic Pain | Communication Skills | Compassion | Death & Loss |Depression| Health Issues | Harassment| Men’s Issues | Mental Health Issues | Mindfulness/Meditation | ParentingPet Loss | PhobiasPositive Psychology | Post-traumatic Stress | Reproductive Loss | Self-Harm | Shame | Social Anxiety | Stress Management | Suicide

Here are some self-help books and websites that you might find useful: click on one of the topics listed above to go directly to that section.



Women Recovering From Childhood Sexual Abuse

The Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis

Trauma and Recovery by Judith Herman


Men Recovering From Childhood Sexual Abuse

Victims No Longer by Michael Lew

Wounded Boys, Heroic Men by Daniel Sonkin

Internet Resources

Male Survivor – Overcoming sexual victimization of boys and men.


For Partners Of Adult Survivors Of Childhood Sexual Abuse

Allies in Healing by Laura Davis

Growing Beyond Survival by Elizabeth G Vermilyea


For Battered Women

The Battered Woman by Lenore Walker

Internet Resources

 Why domestic violence victims don’t leave

Leslie Morgan Steiner was in “crazy love” — that is, madly in love with a man who routinely abused her and threatened her life. Steiner tells the dark story of her relationship, correcting misconceptions many people hold about victims of domestic violence, and explaining how we can all help break the silence.


Date Or Acquaintance Rape

I Never Called It Rape by Robin Warshaw


Women Who Have Endured Verbal Abuse

The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans



Internet Resources

Bully Online Managed by Tim Field. A comprehensive website devoted to all forms of bullying, how to recognize bullying, resources, case histories, and advice.

“Cyberbullying: The New Online Crime”



Written For Women But Just As Helpful For Men In Understanding What Causes Anger

The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner


Anger Management Techniques

The Anger Workbook by Lorraine Bilodeau

Letting Go of Anger by Ron Potter-Efron and Pat Potter-Efron



Anxiety Management Guides

The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund J. Bourne

Mastery of Your Anxiety and Panic II by David Barlow and Michael J. Craske


Managing Panic Attacks

Don’t Panic by Reid Wilson

The Fear Book: Facing Fear Once and For All by Cheri Huber


Internet Resources

Anxiety BC – The purpose of this website is to inform you of the features of the various ways excess anxiety can express itself and also to provide you with effective strategies to begin to address your anxiety.

Anxiety Disorders Association of America – This site offers complete information on anxiety, as well as a special section on teen anxiety.

Bounce Back: Reclaim Your Health is a new program designed to help people experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety that may arise from stress or other life circumstances. The project is led by CMHA BC Division and funded by the BC Ministry of Health Services. You will need a referral from your family doctor.

Guide to Anxiety Disorders

TAPIR: The Anxiety Panic Internet Resource



Assertiveness Skill Training In General

Your Perfect Right by Robert Alberti and Michael Emmons

When I Say No I Feel Guilty by Manuel Smith

Internet Resources

 Your body language shapes who you are

Amy Cuddy talks about how body language affects how others see us, but it may also change how we see ourselves. Amy Cuddy shows how “power posing” — standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don’t feel confident — can affect testosterone and cortisol levels in the brain, and might even have an impact on our chances for success.


Assertiveness Skill Training For Women

The Assertive Woman by Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin



Becoming Attached by Robert Karen



Brene Brown discusses empathy, compassion, and boundaries.


Inside Chronic Pain by Lous Heshusius

The Mindfulness Solution to Chronic Pain by Jackie Gardner-Nix

Internet Resources

Understanding Pain – a 5 minute Australian NIH client education film about chronic pain.

Self-Management Programs By The University of Victoria – Persons with chronic health conditions and family members can participate in self-management programs offered in communities throughout BC at no cost. These are evidence-based programs which provide information, teach practical skills and give people the confidence to manage their health condition(s).

Opioid Addiction – This site is for those suffering from an opioid addiction.  The site contains self-assessment tools, descriptions of how detoxification works, links to support groups, and detailed instructions on how to get help.



Boundaries: When to say yes and when to say no by Henry Cloud and John Townsend

Getting The Love You Want by Harville Hendrix

How Can I Get Through To You by Terrance Real

Life Skills for Adult Children by Janet Wotitz

You Just Don’t Understand Me by Deborah Tannen

Internet Resources

New Conversations – cooperative communication skills extended learning community.


Relationship Issues

Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

Don’t Let Your Kids Kill You: A Guide for Parents of Drug and Alcohol Addicted Children by Charles Rubin

Getting Past The Affair by Douglas Snyder, Donald Baucom, & Kristina Coop Gordon



Internet Resources

Charter for Compassion – TED Prize winner Karen Armstrong’s wish is realized as the Charter for Compassion officially launches. This is a document created by thousands of people around the world. It is capable of enabling a new dialog between the major religions and between religious and nonreligious people.

Self Compassion – This website provides information about self-compassion and is intended for researchers, students, and the general public. It also has a questionnaire where you can assess how much self-compassion you have.

The difference between self-esteem and self compassion – In this TED talk Dr. Kristin Neff talks about the space between self-esteem and self-compassion, and the difference between the two. A very inspiring and helpful talk.



Internet Resources

Troubles with Junk: A Guide to Compulsive Hoarding



Coping With Loss Of Any Kind

How to Survive the Loss of a Love by Melba Colgrove and Associates

For Grief by John O’Donohue

When you lose someone you love,
Your life becomes strange,
The ground beneath you becomes fragile,
Your thoughts make your eyes unsure;
And some dead echo drags your voice down
Where words have no confidence

Your heart has grown heavy with loss;
And though this loss has wounded others too,
No one knows what has been taken from you
When the silence of absence deepens.
Flickers of guilt kindle regret
For all that was left unsaid or undone.

There are days when you wake up happy;
Again inside the fullness of life,
Until the moment breaks
And you are thrown back
Onto the black tide of loss.

Days when you have your heart back,
You are able to function well
Until in the middle of work or encounter,
Suddenly with no warning,
You are ambushed by grief.

It becomes hard to trust yourself.
All you can depend on now is that
Sorrow will remain faithful to itself.

More than you, it knows its way
And will find the right time
To pull and pull the rope of grief
Until that coiled hill of tears
Has reduced to its last drop.

Gradually, you will learn acquaintance
With the invisible form of your departed;
And when the work of grief is done,
The wound of loss will heal
And you will have learned
To wean your eyes
From that gap in the air
And be able to enter the hearth
In your soul where your loved one
Has awaited your return
All the time.

Internet Resources

Widownet – established in 1995, it is the first online information and self-help resource for, and by, widows and widowers.


Spiritual Approach To Loss

When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner


Death Of A Loved One

How to Go on Living When Someone You Love Dies by Theresa Rando


Helping A Child Learn To Cope With Grief

Learning to say Good-By by Eda LeShan



Autobiographies By People Who Have Suffered From Severe Depression

Darkness Visible by William Styron

Undercurrents by Martha Manning


Cognitive-Behavioural Strategies For Managing Depression

Mind Over Mood by Dennis Greenberger and Christine A. Padesky

The Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns


Decreasing Depression By Brief And Practical Suggestions

When Living Hurts by Michael D. Yapko


Using Mindfulness to Ease Depression

The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion by Christopher Germer

The Mindful Way Through Depression by Mark Williams, John Teasdale, Zindel Segal, & Jon Kabat-Zinn


Internet Resources

Antidepressant Skills Workbook

Bounce Back: Reclaim Your Health is a new program designed to help people experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety that may arise from stress or other life circumstances. The project is led by CMHA BC Division and funded by the BC Ministry of Health Services. You will need a referral from your family doctor.

Centre for Mental Health Research Blue Pages at the Australian National University

Dealing with Depression Antidepressant skills for teens

Managing Depression – An informative blog article by Michael D. Yapko, Ph.D.

Mood Disorder Association is a non-profit society dedicated to providing education and support for those with mood disorders and other mental illness.

Mood Gym Training Program – Delivering cognitive behaviour therapy for preventing depression.

Psychology Information Online

U.S. National Mental Health Association online depression screening.

Wing of Madness – Clinical depression information and support.

12 Steps to creating motivation when depressed

Seasonal Affective Disorder


You Don’t Have to Take It: A Woman’s Guide to Confronting Emotional Abuse at Work by Ginny NiCarthy, Naomi Gottlieb, and Sandra Coffman

Internet Resources

Is it harassment?



Managing Pain Before It Manages You by Margaret A. Caudill

Mainstay: A Companion Book For The Well Spouse of The Chronically Ill by Maggie Strong

The Mindfulness Solution to Pain by Dr. Jackie Gardner-Nix

The Wisdom Of Menopause by Christine Northrup, MD

Internet Resources

Self-Management Programs By The University of Victoria – Persons with chronic health conditions and family members can participate in self-management programs offered in communities throughout BC at no cost. These are evidence-based programs which provide information, teach practical skills and give people the confidence to manage their health condition(s).



Examining The Destructive Myths Of Boyhood

Real Boys by William Pollack

Stages And Transitions In A Man’s Life Cycle

Season’s of a Man’s Life by Danial J. Levinson



Internet Resources

Antidepressant Withdrawal – if you are considering stopping your antidepressants, you may want to check out this blog on the best way to do it.

Canadian Mental Health Association (BC) exists to promote the mental health of British Columbians and support the resilience and recovery of people experiencing mental illness.

Centre for Clinical Issues

Education Programs For The Public – Changeways sponsors a series of presentations for the public on psychological topics of broad interest. Psychology Salon aims to provide informative and entertaining programs that offer practical strategies for common life situations.

Mental Help Net – mental health, wellness, education and advocacy.

Mood Disorders Association of British Columbia has a vision of seeing people with a mood disorder living a healthy and active life.

National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) This site provides information from the US Federal agency that conducts and supports research on mental illnesses

Obsessive Compulsive Foundation (OCF) The OCF is an international not-for-profit organization composed of people with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and related disorders, their families, friends, professionals and other concerned individuals

Psychcentral Managed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. The site claims to be the Internet’s largest and oldest mental health social network created and run by mental health professionals to guarantee reliable, trusted information and support communities to consumers, for over 12 years.

The Skillful Means “wiki” – sponsored by the Wellspring Institute – is a great and growing collection of freely offered methods for psychological or spiritual growth.



Full Catastrophe Living by John Kabot Zen

Peace Is Every Step by Thich Nhat Hanh

10 Quotes for a Mindful Day by Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D. July 16, 2009 (below)

Sometimes quotes can be just the bite size piece of wisdom we need to pop us into a mindful state of mind. Here are 10 quotes from leading people in the field of mindfulness that might just do that.

“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.” – Dalai Lama

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” – Dalai Lama

“There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

“If it isn’t good, let it die. If it doesn’t die, make it good.” – Ajahn Chah

“If we learn to open our hearts, anyone, including the people who drive us crazy, can be our teacher.” – Pema Chodron

“As soon as we wish to be happier, we are no longer happy.” – Walter Landor

“Hatred never ceases by hatred; it only ceases by love.This is a timeless truth” – Joseph Goldstein

“There is no enlightenment outside of daily life.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

“Realize that this very body, with its aches and it pleasures… is exactly what we need to be fully human, fully awake, fully alive.” – Pema Chodron

“When we scratch the wound and give into our addictions we do not allow the wound to heal.” – Pema Chodron

Internet Resources

A Review of Mindfulness (8 Page PDF) by Jeffrey M. Greeson, Ph.D., M.S.

Shambhala Sun – You don’t have to be a Buddhist to meditate. It is just that they have 2,500 years of experience to share with us. Click on the link for a number of articles on how to start meditating

Start your Day Right by Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.

Download Meditations You can download free mindfulness meditations from this site

Rollin McCraty Science of the Heart – Recent discoveries have shown that the heart generates a mysterious and powerful electromagnetic field. In this video, Rollin McCraty, Ph.D, Executive VP and Director of Research for the Institute of HeartMath, explores the scientific basis for understanding the amazing ways that we are connected.

4 Steps to Shaping a Wiser Brain – A great site for mindfulness and controlling our negative thinking

Mindfulness is Popular but Does it Actually Do Anything? – A CBC Radio podcast from the program Quirks and Quarks; examining whether mindfulness works



Kids’, Parents and Power Struggles by Mary Sheedy Kurcink



Internet Resources

Cat and Dog Help: Pet Bereavement Resources



Internet Resources

The Psychology of Phobias Whether young or old, male or female, short or tall- everyone, at some point, experiences



Internet Resources

Authentic Happiness – Develop insights into yourself and the world around you through these scientifically tested questionnaires, surveys, and scales.

The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self Compassion

In this TED talk Dr. Kristin Neff talks about the space between self-esteem and self-compassion, and the difference between the two. A very inspiring and helpful talk.

Jane McGonigal: The game that can give you 10 extra years of life

When game designer Jane McGonigal found herself bedridden and suicidal following a severe concussion, she had a fascinating idea for how to get better. She dove into the scientific research and created the healing game, SuperBetter. Click here for her SuperBetter game website.



Internet Resources

David Baldwin’s Trauma Pages

John Briere’s Psychological Trauma Clinic

The Trauma Center (Justice Resource Institute Massachusetts)

Veterans Affirs App for PTSD – free download



Reflections for Mothers and Fathers After Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Infant Death

An Empty Cradle, a Full Heart by Christine O’Keeffe Lafser


Finding Hope and Healing after Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant Death

Hope is like the Sun by Lisa Church


Internet Resources

Fertility Plus by Nancy Newman

MISS Foundation – support groups for family members and resources for caregivers.

“Empty Cradle, Broken Heart” by Davis



Internet Resources

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy Centre of Vancouver, Inc. – a bi-monthly blog that address a variety of topics related to recurrent self-harm and suicidality and other problems characteristic of Borderline Personality Disorder.



Masters of Disguise by Jane Middleton-Moz

Internet Resources

Brene Brown studies vulnerability and shame. Check out her two talks on TED: The Power of Vulnerability and Listening to Shame.



The Art of Civilized Conversation by Margaret Shepherd

The Introvert Advantage by Marti Olsen Laney

Painfully Shy: How to Overcome Social Anxiety and Reclaim Your Life by Marbara G. Markway, Ph.D.

The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook by MM Anthony



Ways To Reduce Stress

The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook by Martha Davis and Associates

Meditation And Mindfulness

Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn

On The Mind-Body Connection

The Wellness Book by Herbert Benson

When the Body Says No by Gabor Maté



Internet Resources

Coping with Suicidal Thoughts is intended for individuals who are currently experiencing suicidal ideation and/or have had a plan or made an attempt to hurt themselves. The document is designed to offer resources, information, support, and practical steps to help cope with suicidality.

Hope and Healing: A Practical Guide for Survivors of Suicide is a guide that focuses on the practical matters that survivors need to deal with after a suicide. This resource was developed by the Suicide Response Initiative of the Calgary Health Region, with support from the Alberta Mental Health Board, and adapted by CARMHA with permission for use in BC.


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